This post is just for Trace’s amusement:

Whenever I need a good laugh and something to put things back into perspective I replay Trace’s appearance on Real Time with Bill Maher where he comments about the topic of Cloning Cows. It is my favorite example of his intelligence and quick wit. His response to being asked his opinion of cloning cattle – “Have cows stopped f#@*ing?”

Reading the story about Trace and Darryl mixing it up brought a recent incident on my parents’ cattle ranch to mind that answers part of that question.

Disgusted with the bulls that artificial insemination produces, my mom decided to raise her own bull from the stock being born in her herd. She says the male products of artificial insemination like each other more than the cows and didn’t know what to do when she let them out with the girls.

The result of her efforts was a totally natural 2000 pound Black Angus behemoth she named Montana. He looked like a buffalo, only square, with a head so big; they had to remove every other rung in the hay feeder.

Unfortunately, bulls have to be rotated out of the herd and two years later, at his prime, Montana found he was locked in the barn on the day my dad decided to bring in his replacement. Mom would have known better, but she wasn’t consulted.

The new bull was unloaded straight to the pasture of cows. Montana took one whiff of the new arrival and tore out the whole side of the barn. My parents have farm equipment to put between the fighting bulls; can you imagine a tour manager trying to get between Trace and Darryl?

The story has a happy ending… Fortunately, Montana thought of my mom as his momma and when he found a tractor between him and his opponent calmed down enough to hear her commands ordering him back to the barn. It took a couple tractors reinforcing temporary walls to keep Montana in that night, but the next day he was transferred to a whole new herd of females.